Tiffani Polk

View Original

He’s Not A Mind Reader

I’d had a hard day at work, and I let my expression show it when I came home.  When I told Robert about it, he said “I’m sorry, anything I can do?” I said no, and I didn’t see much more of him for the next few hours. I sat around getting more upset waiting for him to come back and talk to me or hold me or do something because he could clearly see that I was upset! But, he didn’t.

Some men just don’t pick up on those unexpressed wants and needs. As women, we sometimes have a sense about what our partner may want or need.  While I thought my hubby should have seen that I needed him, he listened to what I said, thinking I needed to be alone. This is a minor example, but I find that sometimes if we just communicate our wants and expectations, it can alleviate a lot of confusion, arguments, and suppressed emotions.

Here’s a couple of things I think you definitely should communicate to your partner sooner rather than later. You might end up repeating yourself for a while, but it will sink in eventually and make all the difference.

You Need His Help

We have so many roles in life – wife, mother, sister, best friend, chef, maid, counselor, boss, coworker, you name it! To others, we look like we have it all together, and while we CAN handle everything ourselves, we don’t WANT to do it alone! If you’re cleaning the house, tell him which areas you need him to do. Ask for his help or perspective on a problem you have at work. Let him know what it means to have him around. Make sure he knows every superwoman needs her superman.

He’s Made You Happy

Our everyday routines sometimes cause us to take each other for granted, but sometimes, Robert might buy me something nice or send me a sweet message, or cook a great meal or plan a romantic moment together. I live for the small things! They make me happy, and when he does something like that, I thank him, reward him, and remind him often of how happy he made me.  Your man wants to make you happy, so make sure he knows when does, so he can keep doing it!

His Foreplay Doesn’t Work For You Anymore

This type of communication isn’t easy, but it beats the alternative. Let’s face it, things change. We’re getting older, bigger, busier and the things we used to like might not work anymore. Maybe you need a little more than you used to of sweet nothings, kissing, and caressing to get you going. Maybe your idea of foreplay is to have him put the kids to bed and clean up so you can get yourself ready to have sex in the first place. You might not be as interested as you once were, but if it’s still important to him, you need a way to get motivated. Whatever it is, find a way to tell him.  And when he follows through, keep your promise, and rock his world!